Elaine Grundy

Is that a good title for a book, or what?  I was recommended this book by Andrew Newberg, M.D. by a wonderful woman,  Eugenia, who teaches meditation and yoga.  I was looking for a book to describe why Meditation is good for you in more scientific terms and this book is written by a neuroscientist so that’s pretty scary in itself!

The stories don’t disappoint, they are more focused on God and faith then I was expecting, which is odd, given the title!  But the experiments on non-religious subjects are fascinating – especially as they use one of my favourite chant meditations: sa-ta-na-ma as the test.  There are a whole ton of conclusions based on the results but the key ones that stood out for me (because they reinforce my own belief system – hehe) are:

With only 8 weeks of practice for 12 minutes a day they found:

1. An almost 50% improvement in memory function (the area the subject wanted to improve) as well as other brain functions that tend to deteriorate with age such as co-ordination, cognition.
2. Increased activity in the prefrontal cortex which helps focus, clarity and attention span.
3. Increased activity in the anterior cingulated that plays a major role in lowering anxiety, irritability, protecting against depression, as well as enhancing social awareness.

Reiki produces alpha state, meditative effects when done consistently over a period of time.  I find it easy to extrapolate that some of these benefits tally with what we are seeing for ourselves as we do Reiki.  Although, to my knowledge, no one has brain scanned Reiki practitioners, I would expect very similar results.  I can’t say my memory has improved, but I can definitely vouch for the other 2!

Even more stunning is that part of the brain is involved with developing our sense of self – yes folks, the Ego has a home!  This ego zone, or parietal lobe, reduces its activity with meditation thus helping us feel more connected, more in the ‘flow’ or ‘in the zone’.  Ie a lessening of self-consciousness enhances one’s intention, ability, and pleasure when faced with a task or goal we want to achieve.

Overtime this part of the brain shows more activity when we are not meditating which helps to increase consciousness, alertness and the ability to resonate with others’ feelings and thoughts.

Sounds good to me!

Reference: How God Changes Your Brain by Andrew Newberg, M.D and Mark Robert Waldman

Website: www.andrewnewberg.com

An Introduction to

The Work of Byron Katie

Presented by

Sue Lee,
Certified Facilitator of The Work
Saturday 31st October, 9am-1pm

“My partner doesn’t appreciate me.”
“The world is a dangerous place.”
“I need more money.”
“I’m too fat.”

Thoughts like these may run
through our minds many times a day, fostering fear, anger, stress, and
depression. How different would your life be if these thoughts never bothered
you again? The Work of Byron Katie is a process that clears the mind. It is a
way to identify and question the thoughts that cause all the suffering and
violence in the world. The Work is simply four questions and a turnaround,
which is a way of experiencing the opposite of what you believe. It is so
simple that anyone with an open mind can do it. This process works. It is radical,
and life-changing.

The Work is used by leading-edge business leaders,
mental health practitioners, coaches, educators, and by millions of people
around the world, as a way to move from confusion to clarity. Practicing this
simple process of self-inquiry, people who have spent years dealing with
stress, fear, anxiety, and depression experience a profound shift in
consciousness, a deep sense of inner peace, and the ability to approach
problems with a clear mind.

“My
partner doesn’t listen to me.”
“My children are disobedient.”
“I hate my
job.”
“My life would be better if…”

Come learn a simple way to clear your mind and move from fear to freedom, from anger to joy, and from confusion to clarity. All you need is an an open mind, pen and paper.

 
Come learn this simple, radical, and life-changing process of inquiry.

During this 4-hour workshop,
you will:

- Learn to identify and
question your stressful thinking.
- Learn to let go of concepts
that are limiting you
- Experience how you
live your life when you believe thoughts that are not true for you.
- Discover new
possibilities and different perspectives.
- Learn how to
facilitate yourself and others using The Work’s four questions and turnarounds.
- Realize what is true for you, and take home a
powerful tool that can help you live with clarity and integrity.

About Sue Lee:

Sue Lee was a certified
Holistic Health Counselor and a Licensed Bodyworker living in the state of
California, USA before moving back to Malaysia in year 2004.  She is a
Licensed Facilitator for The Work of Byron Katie, certified by the Institute of
The Work to share the work with people and to serves as a mentor to
facilitators in training.  She believes that true freedom and joy is an
internal process.  By working with our limiting thoughts, the projected
outside world will come closer in matching our true nature which is love and
truth.

To book your seat: booking@elainegrundy.com
Date: Saturday 31 Oct, 9am-1pm
Venue: 282D River Valley Rd
Fee: S$160

I picked up the book “Power vs. Force” by David Hawkins, MD PhD, to read again a few weeks ago, and was blown away by the ‘newness’ of the information. It was as if I had never read it before (this is the THIRD time I have read this book). This revelation alone is prompting me to go back over my bookshelf and pull out other books I read over a decade ago to reread them too!

Of course it makes perfect sense that this book comes at me from a totally new direction, after all the book is all about the ‘levels of consciousness’, so it goes without saying that as I progress and grow, so my level of consciousness also changes and I have access to a totally new level of understanding.

At my last Reiki class we had a lively discussion around thoughts, the question was ‘how do we control our thoughts’. According to Hawkins and also new scientists such as Rupert Sheldrake (http://www.sheldrake.org/homepage.html) thoughts are actually always present in the universe – a bit like the entire internet and millions of mobile phone conversations are continuously drifting past and through our heads – the only difference between thoughts and mobile phone sound waves, is that we cannot consciously tune in to mobile phone sound waves. However, the idea is the same. Depending on what ‘frequency’ we are vibrating at, we will be able to tune in to different ‘packets’ of thoughts. If you think of a time when you were joyful and happy and felt on top of the world, it would have been very difficult for you to have accessed an abundant number of depressing or morbid thoughts, same goes if you are feeling miserable and depressed – the higher and more joyful thought forms are out of your range.

The way to ‘control your thoughts’ is really to work on shifting your vibrational level so that happy thoughts automatically get accessed. It is actually impossible to control your thoughts, because they are not technically yours. However if you focus on feeling good and doing things that make you feel good, the appropriate thoughts will follow. Try it next time you are feeling low, go and do something (anything) that raises your vibration (ie something that is good for you not reaching for the double chocolate muffin!), go for a walk barefoot, drink a veggie juice or herbal tea, do 5 mins of deep breathing and just watch your thoughts shift gear.

Hawkins’ ‘level of consciousness’ chart is uncannily similar to Abrahams Hicks (speaker on the Law of Attraction) scale of Emotional Guidance Scale and as with Abrahams; Hawkins recommends focusing not on the top level, but on moving up the scale one step at a time. For example, if you are near the bottom, and suffering from depression, deep rage or permanent frustration, trying to reach for total joy and bliss is not only unrealistic, but also mildly ridiculous (and your brain knows it). So when in depression, try some anger instead. At least anger has an action component to it which means your energy is beginning to move out of the soporific inertness of depression. Any movement, even angry movement, is good at this point.

Of course once you get to the next level your focus is then to move to the next and the next so that very quickly you find yourself climbing out of the negative vibrations altogether and into the positive emotions and therefore the positive thoughts.

Can you do it the other way? Can you focus on positive thinking and automatically shift your entire level upwards? Well yes you can as many positive thinking philosophies and trainings attest. This is because it is all linked, but you cannot reach from ‘I hate my life what’s the point of even trying’ to ‘I love my life and I live in joy’ in a single bound. Again it is a matter of reaching for a thought at the top end of your spectrum (perhaps ‘I hate my life and I am need to change it’) and from this top end of the spectrum you can then reach for the bottom end of the spectrum of the next level eg ‘my life could be better, I need to do something about it’.

A double pronged approach is obviously the fastest for change to become permanent – watching your thoughts and reaching for a better one, and watching your emotions and shifting to a better one. It does all take work, you need to be vigilant, disciplined and willing to do the work in order to see results. Seems pretty obviously but amazing how many of us are still happier to blame it all on ‘out there’.

That’s just another low vibration belief!

I’ve just
completed part 1 of the Solution Focus coaching certification run by the Academy of Solution Focused Training and I LOVE the concepts. I have been using them at home and on
unsuspecting passer-bys with great success! 
The general idea is extremely simple: to start with the end in
mind.  Is that a massive revelation to
you?  Probably not very earth shattering,
but if done very specifically, it is amazing how many of your problems
disappear when you start to shine the torch on what you want, as opposed
to what you DON’T want.

This is Law
of Attraction at its finest, which is another reason I love this type of
coaching, it refocuses you on what is working, and pretty much ignores what is
not working.  It’s not what we’re used
to, and not what feels particularly natural, but when you persevere, its
remarkable the results that fall out of this type of enquiry.  Take my daughter for example, she’s 5 years
old and terrified of bedtimes – she has bad dreams.  So every night she lies with me and panics
about all the bad dreams, monsters, and horrid lurking things about to attack
her, obviously not a very good way to get to sleep!  She is 100% focused on what she doesn’t want,
her language says it all “I don’t want to go to sleep cos I’ll have bad dreams”.
I don’t like bedtime because I’ll have bad dreams”, I don’t want to have bad
dreams anymore!”  Is all I get when I use
general questions on her like ‘what’s the matter?’, ‘what’s the problem’, ‘what
do you want?’. 

So with my
Solution Focus hat on I ask her the Goal-focused question which is ‘what do you
want instead?’  She pauses and then says,
“I want to dream about Princesses!”  ‘What
else?’ I ask her, “Fairies!  And
rainbows, and flowers, and unicorns…” 
And so we go on, and very soon she is fast asleep with a big smile on
her face. 

So simple =
too simple?  Try it on anything, any
problem you are struggling with, ask yourself these few easy questions:

1.   What do you want instead?

2.   How will you know when you have what
you want?

3.   How will things be different for you?

4.   What actions will you be taking that
you are not taking at the moment?

Here’s a
recent example from a client of mine:

Problem “I
look at things so negatively, I always start to worry about things that haven’t
even happened yet and probably won’t, it’s so draining –  I can’t sleep at night, I want to stop all
this!  I don’t want to worry anymore.”

1.   What do you want instead?

I want to
be happy; I want to be positive about life.

2.   How will you know when you have what
you want?

I’ll wake
up after a good night’s sleep with a smile on my face, I’ll look forward to
getting out of bed and starting my day, I’ll be excited about my day and what I
have to do.  I’ll feel enthusiastic but
peaceful.

3.   How will things be different for you
and your loved ones around you?

Oh that’s
easy, I’d be much more pleasant to be with! 
I’d be smiling more and have more time for my family, more time for
myself, at the moment I just lurch from crisis to crisis.  I’d be calm, more focused – the smiling is a
big one!

4.   What actions will you be taking that
you are not taking at the moment?

I’d definitely
be taking better care of myself, my diet and probably doing more exercise –
that always makes me feel great.  I’ll
have all my tasks organized so that I know what I have to do in the day instead
of muddling through like I do at the moment, I’d probably actually have a
planned schedule instead of this chaotic mess I have right now!  I’d make sure I have some treats planned in
my week to look forward to, like a spa treat or meeting friends for lunch –
that’s an obvious thing that would start my day well….

Amazing,
just by gaining more clarity on what you actually want, the steps for getting
there also become really clear.  After
all, we all know what we need to be doing; we just get distracted by shining
the torch in the wrong direction, often missing the obvious solutions sitting
right under our noses.

I went to a wonderful talk by Natasha Golding, of PrettySmart and although she was talking about Websites, her nuggets are worth noting for anything we do and stand for.  Her three questions can form the basis of any self-enquiry whether it be on 'how do I market my business' to 'what is my Life Purpose?'

The key is in beginning with your authenticity.  Who are you, and how are you remarkable?  This is the first question and basically asks you to think about your talents and gifts – what makes you who you are, and when people meet you, how would they 'remark' about you to others?  What are the things that other people say about you that make you stand out in their mind?

For example, there are many Reiki Masters in Singapore but I feel I am remarkable in that I offer a down to earth version of Reiki which is very accessible to people entering the 'holistic' field for the first time.  I offer an approach that allows for a great deal of flexibility and for people to choose how best to incorporate Reiki into their existing lifestyle without demanding any rigidity of thinking, beliefs or lifestyle changes.  Having identified this as my 'remark'able asset I know that in all my communications, my blogging, my website, my talks I need to reinforce this and have it obviously show up in everything I do.  In this way, people often comment that what they read on this website is exactly what they get when they meet me, and that to me is a success!

So the first wonderful question to ponder is "What do you do, and how is it Remarkable?"  Natasha says this inspired question comes from Seth Goldin, marketing guru and avid author of many books with strange titles.

The second great question is "Who do you do it for?"  The question of your ideal client (which is also echoed in great books like Michael Port's 'Book Yourself Solid' and Smith and Assaraf 'The Answer') is a much deeper question than it first appears.  Often we think that any client is good, as long as they pay the bills, and even the bad bill payers are better than nothing.  Actually if we look at the amount of time we spend on our bottom 20% of clients we'll notice that the energy we put into our non-ideal clients actually stop us from servicing our ideal clients properly.  This is the case in everything we do.  When I was training and even sometimes in my Reiki talks, I would find myself focusing on the skeptics or the people who seemed the least interested in what I was saying, and it was both exhausting and demoralizing.  Once I found ways to refocus on those who found what I was saying relevant and of value, I found it much more satisfying for me, and for them.  The skeptics would always be skeptics, the disinterested would always be disinterested – no matter how much energy I poured their way!  Once you figure out who your ideal client is, it is much easier to attract them and also much easier to release those clients who are not serving you (believe me, if they are not serving you, you are also not serving them).  This is not only a business gem by the way, I modify this question to attract my perfect friends, interactions and colleagues too!

The final question is "Why do you do what you do?"  As I said, these questions can really be used for anything – including Life Purpose.  Why do you do what you do?  Is it just for the money?  Is it simply a means to an end?  Are you treading water, waiting?  Or do you have a deep and meaningful reason that drives you out of bed every morning?  Find the underlying driving force for what you do and you will find both your motivation, and your life's work.  Honestly, I do what I do because I get to experience the phenomenal power of human spirit every day.  I watch in awe as people transform their lives, their beliefs, their illness.  I get to applaud as people remember themselves, their life's passion and their inner courage.  Its awesome and I do it for purely selfish reasons!

I have been recommended Rupert Sheldrake by two separate friends in the past month so thought I better check him out – wow! This guy rocks!  It’s long but very well worth it, fascinating.

Can you tell if someone is looking at you? In the Amsterdam Science Museum – over 20,000 people have participated in an experiment to see if they can tell if someone is looking at their back. Results are significant, you CAN affect people simply by looking at them, people in the security industry take this for granted, so why is it so hard for the scientific community to accept.

Because the scientific community believes that everything happens in the mind, therefore what we see is actually an image created by the mind, and not an outward projection. Sheldrake’s theory is the obvious one, that we are not seeing the world as a huge image in our mind, but we are reaching outward with our energy and interpreting the world through our senses – an outward extension of our mind and not just inside the brain.

The extended mind model


Take a flock of Starlings, movements are so fine-tuned they never bump into each other and cannot be explained by individuals watching out for each other but rather by each bird being connected to a larger energy fields – emergent fields that depend on each other and are formed by each individual but also the entire group. Sheldrake believes that all packs and groups of higher animals have this ability.

He also believes that telepathy is a normal and not paranormal effect of the mind’s ability to reach outside of the body. He has some fascinating experimental evidence on dogs and their masters and Mothers and their babies. Many of us have had this experience, especially as parents and our ability to ‘sense’ when we are needed. We often talk of ‘telephone telepathy’ where you think of a person and they call instantly or you can tell who it is before you pick up the phone. It seems the closer you are to them emotionally, the more connected and accurate you are. Is this a surprise? Not really as it is a normal phenomenon – but for some reason, it is dismissed by the scientific community as it doesn’t fit in with their ‘mechanical’ view of the way the human body works.

Time for a change?

What is so fascinating is that Sheldrake’s theories are taking on mass, public debate and involvement, it also begs the question, as one field of energy, can we affect the course of our history? If we are all connected and can influence each other, if we can move and form like a flock of Starlings, then is there hope for us to all move towards a better future?

For more info and lots of experimental results www.sheldrake.org. Also some fun ideas for school projects

This is a section of Katie’s Feb ‘Valentine’s newsletter, the woman is a treasure – take the time to read what Stephen, her partner, has to say about their first meeting – wonderful! http://www.byronkatie.com/newsletter_fe09.html

If you say that you love your husband, what does that have to do with him?

You’re
just telling him who you are. You tell the story of how he’s handsome
and fascinating and sexy, and you love your story about him. You’re
projecting that he’s your story. And then when he doesn’t give you what
you want, you may tell the story of how he’s mean, he’s controlling,
he’s selfish—and what does that have to do with him? If my husband
says, “I adore you,” I think, “Good. I love that he thinks I’m his
sweet dream. How happy he must feel about that!”

If
he were ever to come to me and say, “The sorriest day of my life was
when I married you,” still, what would that have to do with me? He’d
just be in a sad dream this time, and I might think, “Oh poor baby,
he’s having a nightmare. I hope he wakes up soon.” It’s not personal.
How can it have anything to do with me? I love him, and if what he says
about me isn’t true in my experience, I would ask him if there’s
anything I can do for him. If I can do it, I will, and if it’s not
honest for me, I won’t. He is left with his story. No one will ever
understand you. Realizing this is freedom. No one will ever understand
you—not once, not ever. Even at our most understanding, we can only
understand our story of who you are. There’s no understanding here
except your own. If you don’t love another person, it hurts, because
love is your very self. You can’t make yourself do it.

But when you come to love yourself, you automatically love the other person. It’s not a choice.
Just as you can’t make yourself love us, you can’t make yourself not
love us. Husbands, wives, lovers—all a projection of mind. When you
truly love someone, a thought like “You should love me” brings laughter
to your heart. Can you hear the arrogance of that thought? “I don’t
care whom you want to love. You should love me, and I’ll even trick you
into it if need be, or at least I’ll try to, out of my self-deluded
head.” This is the opposite of love.

If I think my husband should love me, I’m insane.
Whose business is it whom he loves? His, of course. The turnarounds
show me the way toward what is truer to my heart: I should love me, and
I should love him. Let him love whomever he loves—he’s going to anyway.
The story of whom someone should love keeps me from the awareness that
I am what I’m seeking. It’s not his job to love me—it’s mine.

Dr. Demartini is probably best known for his apperance on ‘The Secret’ and was in town for a talk and workshop.  While I didn’t make the workshop, I was very pleased to be at the talk.  Its not so much that the things he was saying were earth shatteringly new, but his way of articulating an old and wise message was refreshing, namely:

I had the opportunity to work with Twee during a weekend long workshop afew weeks ago at Pure Yoga.  Despite all my years teaching Reiki in a non-doctrine, non-judgmental way I am still such a student in the art of trusting and learning from your own inner guidance system, especially when faced with other ‘expert’ opinions.

Its natural that we have this issue – from birth we have been scheduled, guided, programmed – when to eat, when to sleep, what to eat, when to get up to go to school/work, what to do at school/work, how to study, how to work, how to get ahead, how to exercise, how to eat healthily, blah blah…  Just take a look at the bookstore and you’ll see what I mean!  Twee’s form of Yoga is totally the opposite to anything I have experienced before.  She teaches that we all have an innate sense of rightness for our individual needs, some postures are no good for our body, others are wonderfully invigorating – but no person is the same, so no yoga practice should be the same.  Oooh!  I LOVE that!  how many times have I peeked at my neighbour and thought ‘Jeez, I’m so stiff, how come I can’t do that!’  Now when I do yoga I really feel my body and when it feels forced or uncomfortable I either change the pose or stop it all together – I could not have done that afew weeks ago as I would have been too concerned about what my teacher might have said.  In other words, I was taking my teacher’s knowledge as more important, more ‘right’ than my own experience and truth of the situation.  Duh!

My youngest, who is just 4, is still so true to herself, she dislikes school because “they are always bossing me about and telling me what to do, they don’t let me colour when I want to”.  Simple, yet profound!  Unfortunately we have a way to go before we can choose to wake up when we want, go to work when we want – but we have total choice in eating what we want, and developing our body and soul how we want.

Since I have begun truly listening to my body and my soul I have noticed that it is actually all there already.  I have started experimenting with Ayurvedic cooking and I am amazed at how I can look at a certain fruit or veggie and ask my body “Do I want this?”  and boom – the answer is clear as day – Yes or no.  Amazing!  I’ve even managed to kick my chocolate habit as I ask my body “do I want this?” (whilst staring longingly at a Mars bar ) and the answer, incredibly, comes back “No, but I would like something soothing and sweet and fresh”  so then I eat a mango instead, and feel infinitely better!

The same application can be used in any situation.  Instead of following anyone else’s’ doctrine, how about testing it against your own level of rightness?  This is particularly true of anyone who says “this is right, that is wrong” about ANYTHING!  In Reiki I came to see this many years ago and am still bemused by teachers who teach their own belief and doctrine as ‘truth’.  Their truth, absolutely, but not necessarily yours.

More about Twee Merrigan here: http://www.tweeyoga.com/