Elaine Grundy: looking for Urban Enlightenment

The Seminar Junkie

I’ve just completed a weekend at the Holistic Fair, so fascinating to trial the different treatments and listen to people talk about their own experiences with different courses and techniques.  I almost signed up for several courses, BlahBlah technique, Personal growth this, Meditation that.  I stopped myself and took a deep breath, just wait till the end of the week, I thought. By Monday I was laughing at myself of course, all desire to go ‘learn more stuff’ evaporated overnight as I descended quietly back into my truth, back into my wisdom. 

Yes, I am a recovering Seminar Junkie!

I have spent over 2 decades chasing the key to enlightenment, I have been through more phases and fads than most people have had hot dinners.  Every ‘hot new thing’ is greeted by rolling eyeballs from my long suffering husband as he once again has to take cover from the inevitable fall out as I detox this and ‘let go’ of that.  Of course some of it sticks, but most of it doesn’t.  And because of that, I continue the search.

Last year I had a mini-enlightenment experience.  It was very cool.  I saw myself as I truly was, and I saw others for what they really were – it was a phenomenally beautiful experience, albeit just a glimpse.  But this knowingness has stayed with me, the realization that all I need to do is surrender.  It really is as the Masters say, simply be, simply relax, simply trust.  All that we are is within us; there is nothing “out there” to help us, so stop cluttering up your mind with all this nonsense!

As a Reiki teacher and coach, this is a kind of bizarre thing to say – essentially I am saying that all you need to do to attain bliss, happiness and joy is to surrender to what is, surrender to the present moment, and you will see it is here all along.  What I am saying is that you don’t need me, or any other ‘expert’ to teach you, coach you, tell you what to do. Everything you need is already inside you.  Just stop for a minute, and you’ll see.

Crisis, Wots Crisis?

Panic, chaos, fear, hands in head, tears, “Hell on Earth”…these are the images bombarding us daily in the media since the “Crisis of 2008” began at the end of September.  Trillions of dollars have been lost, some of my banker friends have turned completely grey in a week, others that thought they were retiring with millions now only have half the millions they thought they had.  These are the energies circulating our planet at the moment, and our response to them will dictate how we feel.  We can join the fear, or we can check in with ourselves, in the present moment, how are we doing?

Personally I am sitting in my yoga studio with gentle music flowing, sitting in a very comfortable seat, tapping away on my little computer which I just adore, and looking forward to Hatha!  So, personally, right now, I am just fine.  How about you?

All Spiritual teachers have the same message – there IS ONLY NOW.  There is the mind’s concept of past, and the mind’s concept of the future, but in terms of where we are living, where we are feeling, and where we are being, there is only now.  Maybe you are deeply affected by this crisis, maybe you too have lost millions, maybe your home is about to be repossessed because you can’t meet your mortgage payments, maybe you have lost your job.  These are all the things that are happening to you right now.  But how are you?  Inside, check, are you still here?  Are you still with us?  Do you still have your senses; can you still feel the vibration of love that permeates the universe with every breath?   Probably not!  That is not because it is not there; it is because you believe your mind when your mind says “I can’t be happy right now!  I have lost my money/job/home”, “It is not a time to be happy, it is a time to be in panic/fear/anger/remorse/grief”.  But is that true? 

For the longest time, I read that all we had was ‘now’ and I just couldn’t “get it”.  I would think, “yes, of course I am fine now, but I might not be fine in the future!” or I would think “Yes, I am fine now, but if I loose this or that, then I definitely wouldn’t be fine!”  There is a great video of Byron Katie using enquiry on a woman scared of terrible things in her future, I think many of us may feel like her right now.  It’s also obvious she cannot grasp what Katie is saying, her mind has such a strong hold over her truth, she cannot trust the feelings in her own body, she cannot trust the absolute truth of what is being said to her.  Right now, each and every one of us is fine.  And that is where our happiness is.