My mom just left after a week visit, I'm sooooo sad!!!
Mom and I are best friends, she's my inspiration, my mentor, my conscience, the person I want to be when I grow up. I know, I'm lucky. It wasn't always like this. Growing up I was much closer to my dad in personality (opinionated, strong-willed, confident, life and soul of the party!) whilst my mother was much more reserved (as a child I would think of her as meek and mild). In my mind such a personality would not get you far in the world. You had to speak your mind or you would be overlooked. Sad to say I think the majority of our society agrees with me!
Over the years I have realized that having something to say doesn't mean you should necessarily say it. The wisest and most intelligent people I have met over the years actually say a lot less. They spend their time listening, and then when they speak they measure the quality of their words, not the quantity. I think even now I am too much talking, not enough listening.
My mother listens, she responds with kindness and empathy, she has kept her childlike sense of wonder (that's why her grandchildren adore her!). Over the years I have come to realize that her way of being is by far more confident and more persevering then any amount of opinionated noise. Try as I might to emulate her serenity, my mind constantly races on to the 'next' thought that should be voiced.
The great thing about parenting is the lessons we can learn, and the practice it affords us. Often I find myself jumping in too quickly with my daughter and her thoughts - she'll be asking me a question I think I already know the answer too. She becomes so frustrated when I get it so wrong. I'm learning to let her finish and to give her time to collect her thoughts and express herself fully. I'm learning to be more like her grandmother - listening and not talking.
Practice makes perfect!
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